Chapter One
DIRTY WORDS
EVEN THOUGH MY SHOW is called "Grammar Girl," the secret is that it’s not usually grammar that confounds people—it’s usage. I get complaints from purists, but Usage Girl doesn’t have the same ring to it as Grammar Girl, and my books and podcasts aren’t for purists anyway—they’re for people who actually need help. Usage is about choosing the right word or phrase. It’s something teachers generally expect you to pick up on your own, and it’s the thing you’re most likely to get skewered for if you screw up. (Life is so unfair!) I don’t recall ever being taught the difference between affect and effect, for example; I was just expected to know.
Certain words are more difficult than others. I call them the dirty words, and we’re going to tackle them here.
AN HONORABLE CHALLENGE: A VERSUS AN
A lot of people learned the rule that you put a before words that start with consonants and an before words that start with vowels, but it’s actually a bit more complicated than that.
The actual rule is that you use a before words that start with a consonant sound and an before words that start with a vowel sound.
Squiggly waited for an hour.
Aardvark was on a historic expedition.
An hour is correct because hour starts with a vowel sound. People seem to most commonly get tripped up by words that start with the letters h and u because sometimes these words start with vowel sounds and sometimes they start with consonant sounds. For example, it is a historic expedition because historic starts with an h sound, but it is an honorable fellow because honorable starts with an o sound.
Squiggly had a Utopian idea.
Aardvark reminded him it’s an unfair world.
The letters o and m can be tricky too. Usually you put an before words that start with o, but sometimes you use a. For example, you would use a if you were to say, "She has a one-track mind," because one track starts with a w sound.
Squiggly wants to work as a missionary.
Aardvark wants to get an MBA.
Other letters can also be pronounced either way. Just remember it is the sound that governs whether you use a or an, not the first letter of the word.
Pronunciation Wars
Since pronunciation is what guides the choice between a and an, people in different regions, where pronunciations are different, can come to different conclusions about which is the appropriate word.
Many pronunciation differences exist between British and American English. For example, the word for a certain kind of plant is pronounced "erb" in American English and "her-b" in British English.
Even within the United States there can be regional pronunciation differences. Although the majority of people pronounce the h in historic, some people on the East Coast pronounce historic as "istoric" and thus argue that an historic monument is the correct form.
In the rare cases where this is a problem, use the form that will be expected in your country or by the majority of your readers.
Definitely!
A and an are called indefinite articles. The is called a definite article. The difference is that a and an don’t say anything special about the word that follows. For example, think about the sentence "I need a horse." You’ll take any horse—just a horse will do. But if you say, "I need the horse," then you want a specific horse. That’s why the is called a definite article—you want something definite. At least that’s how I remember the name.
Tweedle Thee and Tweedle Thuh
I find it interesting that there are two indefinite articles to choose from (a and an) depending on the word that comes next, but there is only one definite article (the). But there’s a special pronunciation rule about the that is similar to the rule about when to use a and an: The is pronounced "thuh" when it comes before a word that starts with a consonant sound, and it’s pronounced "thee" when it comes before a word that starts with a vowel sound. It can also be pronounced "thee" for emphasis, for example, if you wanted to say, "Twitter is the [pronounced "thee"] hot social networking tool." I actually have trouble remembering this rule and have to make special marks in my podcast scripts to remind myself to get the pronunciation right. I think I must have missed the day they covered this in school, and I’ve never recovered.
A LOT OF TROUBLE: ALOT VERSUS A LOT
VERSUS ALLOT
The correct spelling is "a lot."
Alot is not a word.
A lot means "a large number."
Allot means "to parcel out."
I WOULD NEVER AFFECT INTEREST JUST FOR
EFFECT: AFFECT VERSUS EFFECT
If you don’t know the difference between affect and effect, don’t worry—you’re not alone. These two words are consistently among the most searched for words in online dictionaries, and I get at least one e-mail message a week asking me to explain the difference. In fact, the confusion over affect and effect could be why impact has emerged to mean "affect" in business writing: people give up trying to figure out the difference between affect and effect and rewrite their sentences, unfortunately substituting an equally inappropriate word. (See "Impact," page 33.)
The difference between affect and effect is actually pretty straightforward: the majority of the time you use affect as a verb and effect as a noun.
Affect most commonly means something like "to influence" or "to change."
The arrows affected Aardvark.
The rain affected Squiggly’s plans.
Affect can also mean, roughly, "to act in a way that you don’t feel," as in He affected an air of superiority.
Effect has a lot of subtle meanings as a noun, but to me the meaning "a result" seems to be at the core of most of the definitions.
The effect was eye-popping.
The sound effects were amazing.
The rain had no effect on Squiggly’s plans.
So most of the time affect is a verb and effect is a noun. There are rare instances where the roles are switched, but this is "Quick and Dirty" grammar, not comprehensive grammar, and if you stick with the verb noun rule, you’ll be right about 95 percent of the time.
An Effective Memory Trick
For our purposes, affect is a verb and effect is a noun. Now we can get to the memory tricks. First, get this image in your mind: the raven flew down the avenue. Why? Because the letters a-v-e-n (in both raven and avenue) are the same first letters as "affect verb effect noun"!
Need another one? Because effect is usually a noun, that means you can usually put an article in front of it and the sentence will still make sense. Look at these examples:
The effect is eye-popping.
He kissed her for [the] effect.
In both of these cases effect is a noun and you can put the in front of it without making the sentence completely weird. The isn’t necessary in the second example, but it doesn’t ruin the sentence. On the other hand, look at these sentences where affect is a verb:
The eye-popping arrow [the] affects everyone that way.
The kiss [the] affected her.
<
Publisher: Henry Holt and Co.
Imprint: Holt Paperbacks
Distributor: MPS
Publication Date: 07-08-2008
Pages: 240
Measurements: 8.25in X 5.50in
